I do not consider myself a reader. My wife would disagree with that. I aspire to read, but many times a book gets left lying on a table wondering what it did to upset me, and why I never picked it back up again. (poor thing...)
So when I felt God telling me to WRITE a book...I KNEW He was crazy (reverently speaking).
I'm no writer. I've barely written 3 blog posts...INCLUDING this one!
So is God crazy? Or am I?!
Well....I really DO KNOW that it's not God. And I'm pretty sure, I'm not. But it has to be someone, right?
Maybe not. Maybe this isn't something crazy or ridiculous. Maybe this is faith. Maybe this is stepping into dependence on God for something I can't do on my own. Maybe this is growth on my crazy spiritual journey. Maybe this is vision and territory that God wants me to step into without a clear cut ending in mind.
I've been reading in 2 Corinthians, and I'm amazed how many times Paul reiterated to the church in Corinth that everything that had and would happen to them was to teach them to depend solely on God.
"Indeed, we felt we had received the sentence of death. But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead." (2 Cor. 1:9)
"On him we have set our hope..." (2 Cor. 1:10)
"We have done so, relying not on worldly wisdom but on God's grace." (2 Cor. 1:12)
"Not that we are competent in ourselves to claim anything for ourselves, but our competence comes from God." (2 Cor. 3:5)
"But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us." (2 Cor. 4:7)
Each roadblock, calling, or mission he faced, Paul knew that God was reminding him to depend on HIM. Not on Paul's abilities, but on God's. Not on Paul's strength, but on God's. Not in Paul's own power, but in God's unlimited, matchless power that even "raises the dead to life"!
I am ready to step into something "crazy" because I know it's not me I'm depending on...it's God! And when I'm depending on Him, the ridiculous things of this world make a little more sense.
Will there be some roadblocks? Probably. Will there be some failures? More than likely. Will I grow in my relationship with God as I depend deeply on Him? Most definitely!
I can't wait to see how it all turns out.